'Please damage my car'

I've gone over my car twice in recent days to see if there is a sign on it that reads: "Please damage my car" because it seems every week there is something new that makes my four-year-old car look like crap.

Readers might remember my earlier documentation of the punks who ripped off the maker's mark from my trunk, and the fresh scratches on my bumper. Nothing short of replacing the whole bumper will make it look right, either. I've tried painting other bumpers with those little nail polish brushes you can buy, and it sometimes looks as bad as the scratch itself.

More recently, my car has suffered other damage. The sidewall of one of my tires was punctured, causing Mrs. Boston Cazy Driving to get an irreparable flat while I was on horseback in Montana. A new tire was in order, but luckily the damaged one was covered under the road hazard policy and was replaced for free. Then as I was walking up to the driver's side of my car yesterday, I noticed someone had difficulty judging how close my car was, and scraped along the bumper underneath the steel rear quarter panel. It damaged some of the area around the wheel well, too. Bugger.

Now, I don't drive a fancy car. Never have. But I like to keep my car nice, and Boston's Crazy Drivers (and its terrible roads) are causing my car a lot of undue damage and aging it beyond its years. When I bought this car, I was hoping it would last at least six years. But, if this keeps up, I'll be driving a 10-year-old car in two years.


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